A few weeks back, two weeks ago today to be exact, Robyn and I had the opportunity to speak to our sons class about autism and how it plays a role in our son Kian’s daily life. We talked about how those on the spectrum may act different from you or I, but how these kids (and eventually adults) are really not that much different. As I wrote back on September 9th, the talk really went well and we found that these kids are more receptive than many might think. 

A week later, Robyn picked up the kids from school when Kian’s teacher came out with an envelope in hand. Considering the fact that we’ve been handed many envelopes preceding an IEP, she didn’t think much of it. She came home, opened the envelope and started reading some of the most funny and heart-warming letters from the kids and Kian’s teacher.  I want to share with you a few excerpts from those letters.

Deven wrote:
 “I know much more about autism now! I understand that people are different, but that is a good thing. Now I know why Kian does not like loud sounds. Now I understand.”

 Breanna wrote:
“What I learned about autism is that they are different about other things that other people don’t. I think the person that made Pokemon (Satoshi Tajiri) is very smart and I think that Kian is going to make a new Pokemon someday.”

 Makynna wrote:
 “I learned that some kids with autism don’t like sounds or light. I learned that a lot of kids and people that are famous have autism. There are different people, but that doesn’t mean that they aren’t special.
They’re just special in their own way.”

There are many, many more letters just like this. These letters really touch me as a dad and I think back to these letters often. 
 
Today I was working out in the yard and like always, I started thinking about what we are doing with F.A.A.S.T. and how we can better reach people, my thoughts quickly shifted to how important being an advocate really is. With the Combating Autism Reauthorization Act being a hot topic the last few days, many of us are advocating to the legislature and our senators to take action. We talk to many people in the community about acceptance of those who are on the spectrum and the need for everyone to be more aware of their needs. We often go to local businesses, restaurants and movie theaters asking them for their help with making things easier for our kids. 

Then it hit me:  shouldn’t we be advocating to our youth? Shouldn’t we be making sure the people who will one day run our world have a full understanding of what our kids need going into the future?

Please understand, I am not saying that we should stop talking to adults about autism, but what I am saying is we need to start talking to the youth more about the roll they can play as they go out into the world. We can make our youth more aware of the challenges our children will face when they are out of the school system. We need our youth to understand the challenges that they will inevitably face to ensure the services for those on the spectrum will need as they mature and go into the workforce. We need to make sure that when mom and dad are gone, the success our kids achieve can continue on as they cement their legacy. 

So here is a challenge I have for each of you: approach your local schools, ask them to educate them on autism. Ask them if you can talk to the kids, if not the whole school your childs classes. Ask your school
leadership to provide their support in teaching the school community and creating this awareness. We have an outstanding opportunity to teach, to lead and to create real change for years and years to come. We have an awesome opportunity to educate those that will need the understanding each of our children need, will we meet that challenge ahead of us?

Today I had the pleasure of taking the kids to the Sahara Cares Autumn Autism Carnival and had a tremendous time. For those of you who aren’t familiar with Sahara Cares (www.SaharaCares.net), they are a 501(c)(3) organization whose main focus is to provide programs and projects aimed at helping at risk children. The Autumn Carnival for Autism is one of their signature events and this happened to be our first year in attendance. They are a fantastic organization and I cannot thank them enough for putting on this event and for making these kids the VIP’s for the day. I saw a lot of smiling faces on those kids and I think that was very telling for how great this program is. To Sahara Cares, I give you two thumbs up and a giant Kudos on a job well done!
As the kids and I walked through the row of different groups, I saw a great support system; a family so to speak with a very important common goal. I saw kind hearted individuals making these kids feel special, not only the kids with autism, but every kid that came to the carnival. Between the prizes, the bounce houses and the games and food, these kids were treated like royalty, like a family. Each person working the event was compassionate and kind, patient and welcoming and so very great. Any way you shape it, this event was a dream come true for this dad and I have a great deal of appreciation to have been lucky enough to be a part of it. I am very grateful for the support system that we have.
Driving home I thought a lot about the great opportunity we have to touch lives and to improve the awareness of our community to the facts of autism.  Last week we talked to our sons class about autism only to receive some of the most touching (and funny) letters from the kids telling us what they learned from our talk. Today, I thought about the conversations I had with a few of the groups about the things
  we are doing and how I would like to work with them to spread the news of the projects they are working on.  I see what a great opportunity we all have, each and every one of us, by simply sharing our story, sharing our vision and fostering cooperation in the name of awareness. Let’s talk to anyone and
everyone we can, tell our stories and share our goal. The more we talk, the louder our voice and the more acceptance we pass on to each and every one of our children as they grow to adults. After everything is said and done, it’s about our kids, let’s continue to make a difference for their legacy.

My lovely bride and I had the great pleasure of attending my sons class and talking to them about our son and autism in general. As Miss Anderson got the class ready to be introduced to us, I surveyed the
group and saw a lot of faces looking back at me in wonder, as in, “I wonder what’s going on.” Although I had prepared for a couple weeks, I started to ask for the right words to come to mind that would educate these young kids about not only Kian, but about autism in general. I could tell the class had some
nerves, but that certainly did not match mine. Understand, I have been presenting to people through our group for almost a year in public meetings, in front of the school administration and the director of Special Education for Weber County, not to mention presentations for my job where I’ve spoken to a room full of high level executives, and most recently a General and multiple Coronels in my job for the Air Force, but never have I been more nervous.

That said, I took a deep breath and just started talking. With my bride at the back of the room for encouragement, I started asking kids about their favorite food, favorite TV programs, video games, etc. I thought this would be a good way to show commonality. It sure did. I started asking them about specific things that my son likes to do, also finding common ground. I asked them about how we are different, how our differences make us who we are and finally, I asked the question, “what is a disability?” and “can you always see a disability?”. After a few kids had answered, one little girl in the back of the room said, “is it like autism?” I was impressed by this little girls response and question, I said, “yes, and that is exactly why we are here to talk to you.” She had a great smile on her face and my nerves were chased away.
 
With autism now on the table, I pulled out a few pictures I had brought along; one of Albert Einstein, another of Satoshi Tajiri and of course, Dr. Temple Grandin. One by one I held up the pictures and asked if they knew these people. With Einstein, I received many raised hands, but they had no idea that he showed signs of autism. They had no idea that he was a quirky guy, only that “he’s really smart” to quote one young guy. The next picture was Satoshi Tajiri, the creator of Pokemon, someone they had no idea has autism but surely all of them knew about Pokemon! Finally, I held up the picture of Dr. Grandin, most of these kids had no idea who she even was. As I told the kids about all of these figures stories,
their brilliance, their creativity, their accomplishments, I would try to get across to them “different, not less.” Just like each of them, they are different from each other, they have different skills, and they have their own unique self.  I was trying to get my final points to really sink in.

In hopes of getting the point across, I started talking about Kian’s struggles. We talked about his challenge in making friends, his sensitivity to loud noise, his quirky, yet very funny sense of humor. We talked about how autism makes him different from each of them, but I came back to the ways that they are exactly the same. We gave examples of how the loud noises and lights bother him and can result in meltdowns, that this is just a part of who he is and most of all, how they could help Kian with these struggles. We asked them that next time they see any kid, not just Kian having a meltdown, to stop and think about why that might be happening, maybe they don’t have control and what they really need is their compassion. We talked about bullying and how it is much “cooler” to intervene than to involve themselves in the bullying. To wrap it up, we talked about watching out for others who may have a disability that doesn’t include a cane or a wheelchair and how they can really make a difference in a life with concern and love. I guess time will only tell which path will be chosen.

The great part of this process was seeing some of these kids come  up to us afterwards and talk to us. One little girl came up to us and said, “I just love Kian, I don’t know why kids pick on him”. I know that these are just words, but it goes to show that some of our kids have a great deal of compassion
for others; true, genuine compassion. Maybe if we all start advocacy at a younger age, more kids will grow to be adults with the same compassion. Maybe by growing up with compassion, awareness and acceptance will go hand in hand and make each of our jobs that much easier.